Flash Exercise Online Portfolio
TEACH THE TEACHER
[FlashXer] EXERCISE, SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 23, 2008
Yesterday was the anniversary of the dreadful day in Dallas,
when JFK was taken away from us. I often wonder what might
have happened had he listened to his advisors and stayed the hell
away from Dallas..We can speculate, of course, and I do from time
to time. If we had pulled out of Nam, as we probably should have,
how different might our world be today? Speculation doesn't help much...
it was a tragedy I remember in painful detail. All of it...the shock
when
I heard it, and dark days of mourning afterwards, and the aftermath.
And yet, we hardly recognize the event now, like a lot of history it
is ignored. The list of important events forgotten is unlimited,
and an old guy like me can sit and wonder. What the hell is really
important
to us? It won't be long before 9/11 will become just a footnote in
our history. Its a pity, isn't it?
Here's our prompt...see what you can do with it...it should have
some meaning for you. Hope it does.
YOU'VE GOT AN UNPRECEDENTED CHANCE TO DO SOMETHING MEANINGFUL HERE.
IT IS A REAL OPPORTUNITY
Usual rules. 1000 words. In the subject line, please, your name,
the word opportunity and the story title.
You've got an unprecedented opportunity. Take it, or else...
Have fun
Irv
12/3/08 Janine's Opportunity "Teach The Teacher" 163 words
"You have a chance to do something meaningful here, Meg."
"Do you really think so, Mr. Perkins?"
"Yes, Meg. I do."
"But helping little kids to read doesn't seem like all that big of a deal."
"Imagine what the world would be like if people graduated from school and didn't know how to read. It all starts here."
"Alright, Mr. Perkins. If you say so."
A few minutes later...
"Mr. Perkins, I don't think this is working."
"Why? What's happening?"
"I gave each of the kids a book and asked each of them to read it to me and they just gave me blank stares. Maybe these kids didn't come equipped with their reading computer chips installed in their brains."
Mr. Perkins gave a lot of thought about the computer generation and how easily it is to forget how things began. Meg didn't remember learning how to read and didn't know how to pass it on to others. Teachers really are important people.
12/04/08
Very creative story, Janine. Love the computer chip idea! But for me, I
would've found the ending funnier if you had ended with something like: Mr.
Perkins shook his head and gave a lot of thought about the computer
generation. But that's just my opinion, others may disagree.
Harriett
12/06/08
Interesting (and likely) near-future spec-fict story. The concept is
good, and the dialog flows nicely for me right up until the end. A
couple of things kicked me out of the story at the last moment though.
First, using the term "computer generation" is weak. We have already
had the computer generation come (and in some respects go). Perhaps
this future generation would be called something like the "cybernetic
generation".
Second, I like the sentiment of the final sentence. Having the story
come to such a clear, ringing apex is effective. However, it appears
a bit stark as it is. Maybe make it a new sentence onto itself. The
wording also feels a little empty. I'm afraid to make a suggestion,
but I expect your could dig a little to extract a greater impact.
--Eric
website created by Janine Bouyssounouse.
Last updated 12/07/08