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A COLORFUL NIGHT
[FlashXer] EXERCISE: TUESDAY, JUNE 10, 2008
The item in todayh's paper enlarged on the prompt here.
The people in question made a ral fuss, and with the cost of proms
theses
days, I don't know that I blame them. Result...we you figure the
result in your story. They had
to call the local gendarmerie...and what ensued...well, it makes a
story.
THE HIGH SCHOOL PROM WAS A REAL DISASTER.
THEY GOT THERE LATE, AND WERE NOT ALLOWED IN.
So, see what you can do. Usual rules: 1000 words.
In the subject line, please, your name, the word Prom
and the story title.
Have fun
Irv
06/10/08 Janine's Prom "A Colorful Night" 233 words
The high school prom was a real disaster. Shelly and Greg got there late and were not allowed into the gym. Too many people made counterfeit tickets to the prom to go for free. The gym had reached maximum capacity early in the evening. People with real tickets began to gather outside the building.
The police officer called in to handle the crowd announced people would be let in as people came out of the building so that they would be able to enjoy their prom. This wasn't good enough for Shelly and Greg.
Shelly and Greg had heard the rumors going around school that people wouldn't get into their own prom. They pulled out paint ball guns from the trunk of the car and slipped into the gym through a back door. They unloaded their guns at the crowd inside. Yellow, blue and green paint was everywhere. Dresses were ruined. Rented tuxes were going to be very expensive.
Shelly and Greg left the guns in the dumpster and quietly rejoined the crowd outside the gym as people started to pour out of the doors by the officer. As promised, the people standing outside got to go inside when the maximum capacity allowed. The people with the real tickets enjoyed a more decorated prom than they expected. People avoided the chairs until the paint was dry and they all had a good time.
06/10/08
Hi Janine,
Cute little tale of how to get into a prom and get rid of the cheaters. Actually, this stragegy could work in other places as well.
I didn't cite anything in your manuscript.
By the way, congratulations on all the acceptances you recived---the ones I saw listed on Pam Casto's latest newsletter. Keep up the good work!
Regards, Mike
06/10/08
Hi Janine,
Very clever take on the prompt. And, a very colorful prom it was! Just a couple comments below.
Fun read!
Catherine
A COLORFUL NIGHT by Janine Bouyssounouse 233 words
The high school prom was a real disaster. Shelly and Greg got there late and were not allowed into the gym. Too many people made counterfeit tickets to the prom to go for free. The gym had reached maximum capacity early in the evening. People with real tickets began to gather outside the building.
The police officer called in to handle the crowd announced people would be let in as people came out of the building so that they would be able to enjoy their prom. This wasn't good enough for Shelly and Greg.
Shelly and Greg had heard the rumors going around school that people wouldn't get into their own prom. They pulled out paint ball guns from the trunk of the car and slipped into the gym through a back door. They unloaded their guns at the crowd inside. Yellow, blue and green paint was everywhere. Dresses were ruined. Rented tuxes were going to be very expensive.
Shelly and Greg left the guns in the dumpster and quietly rejoined the crowd outside the gym as people started to pour out of the doors @@@don't think you need 'by the officer' here @@@ by the officer. As promised, the people standing outside got to go inside when the maximum capacity allowed. The people with the real tickets enjoyed a more decorated prom than they expected. People avoided the chairs until the paint was dry and they all had a good time. @@@think you say 'people' too much in this paragraph - may flow more smoothly if you change a few - maybe kids or students?, just a thought.@@@
06/10/08
Hi Janine,
Cute story. Nothing to cite. -Rita
website created by Janine Bouyssounouse.
Last updated 06/11/08