Flash Exercise Online Portfolio
GOOD OR BAD FORTUNE?
[FlashXer] EXERCISE: FRIDAY, DEC. 12, 2008
These days, everything nationally, and world wide seems to be
screwed up. I put together a small money stake: about $250
and made a bid for a senate seat, but either I was too old, or my
stake was not large enough. I said i cold garner another $50
or so, but I was still turned down. And that's the way it has gone
all day. Maybe because I have no job to go to, and no serious
work obligations, but more and more what is happening in the
world seems stranger and stranger. Senate seats for sale,
governor's wives with truck drivers vocabulary, help for
bankers but not for workers...it is as the king of Siam said,
a puzzlement. But one does the best one can to cope...
and fervently hope things will get better. They can't, it
seems to me, get much worse: Heres' your prompt, see if that
helps at all...
THIS HAS GOT TO BE MY SCREW UP DAY.
EVERYTHING I HAVE TOUCHED HAS TURNED TO - - - -.
Usual rules, 1000 words. In the subject line, please, your
name, the words screw up and the story title.
I tell you this: no matter what you write, you can't screw it up.
Have fun
Irv
12/12/08 Janine's Screw Up "Good or Bad Fortune?" sexual content 135 words
"This has got to be my screw up day. Everything I have touched has turned to ..."
"What Harry? Has turned to what?"
"I don't want to tell you, Sara."
"But, why?"
"I'm afraid you'll leave me if I tell you."
"I love you. I won't leave you."
"Okay, brace yourself. Believe it or not, everything I touch turns to silver, so we can never have sex again."
"So your life has turned into a fairy tale. Our money problems are solved. And you are worried I will leave you because we can't have sex when we're not having it in the first place?"
"Okay, so I didn't look at it that way."
"Well, I guess I can tell you about my secret Latin lover now. You won't mind if he comes to visit, right?"
12/12/08
Hi Janine
This is my first crit for this workshop, so please take it with a grain of salt.
I enjoyed this and was impressed you wrote it in 26 minutes. The dialogue was great and flowed nicely. Sounds like a typical married couple to me And you are worried I will leave you because we can't have sex when we're not having it in the first place."
Kind regards
Scott
12/13/08
LOL!!! Now was that stupid of Sara or what. I can see a big silver statue in Harry's near future. No crit. -Rita
12/13/08
Hi Janine,
Funny story. Short and sweet.
Hal
12/13/08
Janine,
As always, with yours, I see this in cartoon blocks. Very funny. You've managed to give me a hook, turning things to silver. Good conflict with how that solves their problems and then a naughty resolution that could either be sexy or deadly depending on how Harry take the news that Sara has a lover. Only nit I saw was that the sentence that starts with, 'And you are worried ...' should end with a question mark. A fun read!
Sharon
website created by Janine Bouyssounouse.
Last updated 12/13/08