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Assignment 2 Mechanics 2

Assignment for Session Two
Take a few minutes to think about the last good book you read, and then write a short (250 words or so) review telling a specific audience why that book is so good and why they should take the time to read it. Write this without paying attention to sentence structure. Just write it down or type it into your computer. When you're done, go mow the grass, shovel the sidewalk or enjoy a snack, and then come back.

Welcome back. Now read your review, paying close attention to the words and sentence lengths and structures you've unconsciously chosen. Do you recognize a pattern in your writing? Are the words and sentence structure appropriate for your chosen audience? Are there places where you might vary the sentence structure to make the piece more interesting? Can you use (but not overuse!) parallel construction in words, phrases, tenses and conjunctions? Make your revisions and submit the revised work for your instructor's comments.

If you don't want to write a book review, try a review of a concert, movie or television show instead. Or if there's something that would be more relevant to your own writing, write a "review" of that: describe a new product your company is launching; write about the capabilities of a new software application; critique a restaurant; detail the effectiveness of an administrative procedure you've implemented at work.


First Draft

“Bird by Bird” by Anne Lamott is an entertaining book on the art of writing and life in general. Anne isn’t afraid to use swear words sparingly in her writing to add effect to what she is saying. She is blunt and direct in her advice on everything from listening to your own internal muse to not listening to the internal self loathing voice of despair. Her advice on telling the truth, but embellishing characters based on real people in order to avoid libel is interesting and practical.

Anne’s discussion of writing books as gifts is unusual, but good advice. She discusses how writing to or for this specific person gets right to the heart of the writing and thus leading to more meaningful writing that readers will enjoy reading. Anne’s idea to combat writer’s block with the idea of living today as if tomorrow will never come is a unique way to look at the writing process. Taking a step away from writing to go gather wonderful experiences in this world will yield better writing after this break.

The discussion of writing shitty first drafts and writing a novel one short assignment at a time both help free and help focus a writer. It is okay for the first thing on the page to not be very good at all. It is also okay to focus on very small sections of writing to make them the very best they can be, just one step at a time. Her advice of looking through a one-inch frame in order to focus in on the details of the topic help the reader understand how to not feel overwhelmed with the entire project at one time.



Second Draft

“Bird by Bird” by Anne Lamott is an entertaining book on both the art of writing and life in general. Anne isn’t afraid to use swear words sparingly in her writing to add effect to what she is saying. She is blunt and direct in her advice on everything from listening to your own internal muse to not listening to the internal self loathing voice of despair. Her advice on telling the truth, but embellishing characters based on real people in order to avoid libel is interesting and practical.

Anne’s discussion of writing books as gifts to friends and family members is an unusual way to get to the emotional center. Anne’s idea to combat writer’s block with the idea of living today as if tomorrow will never come is a unique way to look at the writing process. Taking a step away from writing to go gather wonderful experiences in this world will yield more enriched writing.

The discussion of writing “shitty first drafts” and writing a novel one short assignment at a time both help free and help focus a writer. The first thing on a page doesn’t have to be any good. It is also okay to focus on very small sections of writing to make them the very best they can be, just one step at a time. Her advice of looking through a one-inch frame in order to focus in on the details of the topic help the reader understand how not to feel overwhelmed with the entire process.


Instructor Blue: Hi Janine—
What fun to see a review about this book. This has long been a favorite for most writers, I think.
You did a good job of bringing details to your work. You were clear and worked into different aspects or ideas to explore well.
I notice a tendency to follow a pattern with style; the basic sentence structure is frequently the same and the sentence lengths are very similar. Sometimes it’s a good idea to mix that up a little in order to make the rhythm of the language as interesting as the material being discussed. Variety can perk up a reader’s ears.
Sometime just do a check on the work to see how it functions structurally. Take note of the length of your sentences for a few paragraphs (number of words) and look to see if you use an occasional introductory phrase or reverse syntax here or there. Sometimes its fun to simply take a sentence and revise it two or three times to see how many ways you can say the same thing. Of course, clarity is always the ultimate goal, but reader attention is also important. You can also take note of what you’re reading and see what sort of syntax and sentence length other writers tend to use.
Great job with the grammar, punctuation, etc. I don’t have a lot of suggestions.
I like the parallel structure you used in the third sentence with the “listening to” and the “not listening to.”
In the next sentence, I’m assuming that the “but embellishing characters based on real people in order to avoid libel” is an added element, an appositive, so I would put a second comma after “libel.” This will clarify the phrase’s role.
The first sentence of the last paragraph is a little confusing. The subject is “discussion” so the verb “help” would need to reflect the singular subject (helps).
This isn’t a lot to offer for this piece of writing. I think you’re doing a good job of controlling the craft and using specific details. That really zeroes in on the requirements for connecting with a reader.
Let me know if you have questions.
M

3/7/2006 7:48:09 PM

janinecb: Thank you for the kind words. I have been trying to decide if I have a future as a writer and you give me hope. I have been thinking of learning how to write articles for magazines. Do you have any advice?
3/7/2006 10:33:39 PM

Instructor Blue: I would suggest first doing some smaller stuff for a local newspaper or for some online sites to get a feel for the work. Of course, read tons of material in the magazines you like that have articles such as though you'd like to write.

As you decide on a publication, consider writing some responses to some of the articles: letters, short blurbs, related ideas. This can help build a relationship with an editor and lead to some ideas to query the editor with.

Also, send for writers guidelines to the publications you like (or look them up online). These often provide a LOT of information about what editors want!

That ought to get you started!

M
3/8/2006 1:16:43 PM

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